Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Family Life
The post below is from Dennis Rainey's website. It is the 3rd installment of an interview with a lady who deals with adoptions. Good stuff. Mike
Fishing
Well, fishing was a success. Ever since our neighbor let Garrett sit by him while fishing, these boys have asked repeatedly for fishing gear. Today was the day.
Monday, March 22, 2010
March 22
We are 24 days into this adventure, but who is counting!! Each day that passes is another one we don't have to relive. Each day is another day that the boys are in their new environment and we are with them. Each day is another day that they have exposure to the language and our routine. Each day is another day that they are learning about their new place in life.
This adventure is difficult. Our comfortable life has been turned upside down and inside out. The real cost of our decision is with us daily, sometimes hourly. We seek the Lord for his wisdom and guidance.
Our adventure cannot be as challenging as what the boys are experiencing. I cannot imagine being six and eleven, leaving everything familiar behind and stepping into a new world. The language, the tastes, the sites are all different. The one constant is the brother that is by your side.
We are working on helping them to learn the boundaries in this new world. With the language difference, it is a challenge. Add to that the institutional world that has been their home, and their home life before the orphanage and we have no idea what they are all dealing with. Today we battled over having "no" mean "no". Thankfully I am bigger then the younger boy and can usually avoid his reach, but it is taxing to fight the battle. We have tried to not sweat the little things, ie, changing clothes, brushing teeth, eating meals. Some things have to addressed, thus there are the battles.
The girls are learning what we meant when we talked about the "cost" of adoption. We talked about what that would be other then $$, now we are experiencing it first hand. The loss of peace and quiet in the home, parents that are busier and have less focus, and little brothers that can be pesky. Ellen, Jessica, and Rebecca have been huge helpers in taking the boys outside and kicking the soccer ball or playing on the swing set. For that I am very grateful. We try to allow them to have their own time as well, but we are still working on getting all this figured out.
All prayer support is greatly appreciated. We are in the trenches and it is a battle for their hearts, minds, and souls. We are confident that this is the path that the Lord wants us on, so we will trust him. Others have gone down this path and survived. We will press on....
Doris
This adventure is difficult. Our comfortable life has been turned upside down and inside out. The real cost of our decision is with us daily, sometimes hourly. We seek the Lord for his wisdom and guidance.
Our adventure cannot be as challenging as what the boys are experiencing. I cannot imagine being six and eleven, leaving everything familiar behind and stepping into a new world. The language, the tastes, the sites are all different. The one constant is the brother that is by your side.
We are working on helping them to learn the boundaries in this new world. With the language difference, it is a challenge. Add to that the institutional world that has been their home, and their home life before the orphanage and we have no idea what they are all dealing with. Today we battled over having "no" mean "no". Thankfully I am bigger then the younger boy and can usually avoid his reach, but it is taxing to fight the battle. We have tried to not sweat the little things, ie, changing clothes, brushing teeth, eating meals. Some things have to addressed, thus there are the battles.
The girls are learning what we meant when we talked about the "cost" of adoption. We talked about what that would be other then $$, now we are experiencing it first hand. The loss of peace and quiet in the home, parents that are busier and have less focus, and little brothers that can be pesky. Ellen, Jessica, and Rebecca have been huge helpers in taking the boys outside and kicking the soccer ball or playing on the swing set. For that I am very grateful. We try to allow them to have their own time as well, but we are still working on getting all this figured out.
All prayer support is greatly appreciated. We are in the trenches and it is a battle for their hearts, minds, and souls. We are confident that this is the path that the Lord wants us on, so we will trust him. Others have gone down this path and survived. We will press on....
Doris
Monday, March 15, 2010
Life with two boys
I guess we keep forgetting about this blog This is for everyone who has not met the boys
Life around here can get crazy. Garrett can be a bit of a challenge at times He says no first to anything except borsh ( a Ukrainian beat soup I think) For me as the oldest I have to back off on being mom and at times I have to be a mother figure due to her or Dad's absence
Garrett and Mitch are adjusting well to three older sisters. They love teasing us. Right now they have discovered the many uses of the phone and I have to stop them
MITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok I'm back and Mitch is doing his homework with me, Mom and Dad are both at work
I barely remember the desperate days in Ukraine.
No I won't forget what God did but I sure am glad to be home
Ellen for everyone
Life around here can get crazy. Garrett can be a bit of a challenge at times He says no first to anything except borsh ( a Ukrainian beat soup I think) For me as the oldest I have to back off on being mom and at times I have to be a mother figure due to her or Dad's absence
Garrett and Mitch are adjusting well to three older sisters. They love teasing us. Right now they have discovered the many uses of the phone and I have to stop them
MITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok I'm back and Mitch is doing his homework with me, Mom and Dad are both at work
I barely remember the desperate days in Ukraine.
No I won't forget what God did but I sure am glad to be home
Ellen for everyone
Monday, March 8, 2010
March 8, 2010
It was a beautiful early spring day in Indiana. Our boys enjoyed playing in the backyard most of the afternoon. They spent sometime just talking as they sat in the swings.
I have been wanting to provide an update on how our adventure is going now that we are back in familiar territory. We have been home for ten days and I would give the overall experience a B-. I thank my heavenly Father for a supportive husband and three teenage daughters that are maturing into wonderful women and big sisters!!!
The boys, Mitchell and Garrett, are responsive, lively kids. Mitchell is a huge help in that he can read Ukrainian so we use Google translate daily. He also knows some English and is doing well picking it up. He is a positive kid and goes with the punches. He tries all kinds of food and lets us know what he thinks. He has been respectful of the boundaries that we have set in regards to the Wii, watching videos and computer games.
He is a good big brother to Garrett.
Do you remember what life was like when you were six? I don’t either because my world was secure with minimal changes. Garrett’s world has been turned upside down and he is trying to figure out what it is all about. We were to begin kindergarten today. We had his backpack ready; he knew that it was today, we thought we were going to be okay. He woke up with a cloud over his head; he was not going to school. Mike and I got him dressed, loaded him in the car, and drove the two miles to Carey Ridge Elementary school. He screamed Ukrainian the entire way. I went in alone and talked with the teacher. We decided to attend school on Wednesday during music class with Mitchell and try to phase him into school. While I was in the school, Mike called Mitchell and had him listen to what Garrett was screaming. He told us that he was afraid. Okay, I can handle that! We returned home, went over the plan with both boys and the cloud lifted. Two other areas of challenge have been seatbelts and eating. Seatbelts were optional in Ukraine. I don’t recall seeing any children in safety seats but here the law says Garrett has to sit in one. He doesn’t like that law and continues to challenge its relevance to him. We are unwavering. Food has been another area of struggle. It does not seem to be an important part of life and he has chosen to not participate in meals. We have made sure there has always been something available that we know he eats, yet he chooses to not. We don’t think he will starve. Tonight he did well with dinner so praying that the food control is fading.
Today was a good day. Both boys spent most of the afternoon outside playing on the swing set or riding bikes. Garrett is learning and is doing well. Mitchell rode around the block three times by himself. He is in need of a bigger bike which will be coming from Ohio soon. I am thankful that the weather is such that they can be outside to get rid of their boy energy.
We again thank you for your prayer support. Both Mike and I have felt fatigue but not over whelming. We both are emotionally rooted in the fact that this is the path the Lord wants us on and he will provide what we need. These are precious boys and we are enjoying getting to know them.
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